First Day Back

whydoyouthinkthisis
This is the first day back from vacation. The replacement left the truck below empty, and I had to buy gas before doing anything. The mileage was 46660.
This was a good morning to listen to the radio, as long as you don't have a wreck when you hear certain things. There are three people in the news who have problems making public statements.
The first is Alberto Gonzales. There are reports of Senators openly laughing at his statements during some hearings. Whatever he was saying, he was not convincing.
The second is America's Canine Queen, Mike Vick. He read a (Lawyer Written) statement about his situation. " I ax you for forgiveness and understanding...I have turned my life over to Jesus"
The good news, I was at a red light when I heard that. Otherwise, I might have had an accident.
The Moe to today’s Curly and Larry is Miss Teen South Carolina Lauren Caitlin Upton. Of course, she is much, much prettier than Moe.
She is also the only one of the three known by her first, middle, and last name. Usually this honor is reserved for criminals. Why aren’t Mike Vick and Alberto Gonzales referred to by all three names? And what is number seven's middle name?
While giving an amusing non answer to a question may put the Rhodes scholarship out of reach, it is hardly a felony.

Hokie Blokie

youputtheredwirehereandtheblackwirethere
There has been a part of the Mike "Youbet" Vick case that has gone unreported.
This has been a bad year for Virginia Tech.
Mr. Vick used to play quarterback for the Hokies. Does anyone know whether or not he graduated?
According to my confidential source, Dogfighting is a major pastime in HokieLand. This is reportedly where Mr. Vick was introduced to the custom.
A few months ago, a dog lover named Cho decided to do something about it.


thisismorninginamerica
On a lighter note, It will be interesting to see how Bill Bennett deals with this affair in his new book. While the virtues of dogfighting and performance based canine execution is debatable, the "story" that Mr. Vick is not betting on the dogs needs to be weighed in. Of course, gambling addiction is a virtue that "Morning in America" guy knows a few things about.
Mr.Vick is saying, in effect, that he did not get a return on his investment. Mr. Bennett is a cheerleader for the virtue of capatalism. Gotta Problem?

As many observers of the Hispanic community have noted, if you give a Mexican a t shirt, he will wear it, regardless of what is said on the shirt. This can lead to some highly amusing scenes, like a man carrying a twelve pack while wearing a shirt with an AA slogan.
There have been a lot or red number 7 jerseys on Buford Hiway recently.

Spell check suggestions for this feature:
Youbet- doubt
Vick- Vicki vice Vickie Vicks Vicky
Hokies- hocks
hispanic- hispano whispering
Hiway- Hawaii Heiwa Howa

Rankin Blank

iwouldn’twearthattoadogfight
So, Michael Vick was indicted for dogfighting. Maybe we can get rid of him and move the program forward.
The Falcons have been an embarrassment to the city ever since they were hatched in 1966. As an oldtimer, I remember the excitement of that first season, and the disappointment that quickly set it. In the forty odd years since then, the "dirty birds" have never but back to back winning seasons together. A football mad city has been deprived of it's birthright.
Once, a christmas shopper at Lenox Square left two Falcons tickets under his windshield wipers. When he got back to his car, there were four.
In the late eighties, Falcons owner Jed Clampett threatened to move the team if he couldn't get a new stadium. The first time the Atlanta City Council voted on the plan, the answer was no. A second vote a week later saw enough councilpeople changing their votes to get the Dome built. A hotel motel tax was enacted to pay for it.
Jacksonville soon got an expansion franchise, and is no longer on the market.
And so we go into the nineties. Deion Sanders and Jerry Glanville came and went. Coach Dan Reeves/Milburn Drysdale got the birds into the super bowl, but a defensive player was arrested the night before the game for soliciting a hooker. The game turned into a retirement party for John Elway.
By this time original owner Rankin Smith/Jed Clampett had moved on to that cement pond in the sky, and the "Five Smiths" put the team on the market. Home Depot big wheel Arthur Blank bought the team, and decided not to make orange aprons the new uniform.
There was great hope when Mr. Blank bought the team. At some point the Birds drafted Michael Vick, who created great excitement in his first season.
Now, Mr. Vick is an exciting player, no doubt. The marketing oriented Mr. Blank saw a national brand he could put on display, and offered Mr. Vick a nine figure contract.
Now we are stuck with the idiot. Unless Mr. Vick's contract has some clause about indictments/convictions, even if we don't play him, we still own him a pile of money. No way he can be traded, unless an owner even dumber than Rankin Blank wants a "hot dog" quarterback. Maybe Rush Limbaugh will buy a team.
After he got the big bucks, his motivation went bye bye. His passing and leadership qualities do not keep pace with his running, and one day soon he will slow down a step and not be good for running.
This all makes Mr. Blank's business smarts look less and less impressive. While side kick Bernie Marcus has built a highly successful aquarium (and no doubt gotten some nifty tax breaks in the process), Rankin Blank has given the bank to a dog fighter in the tank.
The best thing that could happen to the Falcons would be to ditch Vick, and build a boring team that wins games with defense and hard hitting. Mr. Vick seems to want to show his bite in Virginia.